so blessed, i can't contain it!

Dear beloved,

I have a little sharing for you from last night, when we gathered for Stan's farewell. Mr. Hanitio humbly obeyed God and prayed for us one by one for three hours non-stop, and I want to share what I have been blessed with, to you, Cui and to all of you whom I believed have been as blessed as me. I sort of don’t know where to start now for there are so many things I want to share. I will pretty much pour out my heart here, so if some are too personal, feels too close for comfort, I apologise.

Cui prayed that I am currently being shaped and molded into who God wants me to be, so there are struggles in my life. I believe all of us is continually shaped and sanctified throughout our lives, so this was pretty generic. That’s what I thought, at first, but he continued with more.

God will use me to lead, to be a leader, which sort of my situation at present although I lead in a small scale. Since he called me to be one, He’s going to equip me for it, thus all the process of shaping and molding aforementioned. Still following?

Then, this is what overwhelmed me and I found it hard to believe at first. God is going to use me to bring God’s presence wherever I go. Wow. It is a great privilege and a great responsibility. I am still amazed. Why? Why me Lord? Why would You want to use me? I am dirty, sinful, unworthy to bring such holiness and glory down, “Woe to me, for I am unclean, not just my lips but my being, heart, mind, body and everything!”

Yet this is His promise, and my God keeps His promises. It made me realize that the grace I understood all this while, in fact, is even greater, beyond comprehension. The immensity of God’s love, the greatness of His grace and the power of His blood in our salvation and redemption is beyond what is fathomable. He does not see me anymore; the Father sees Jesus’ righteousness that is imparted upon me. He truly restored us to our original purposes. And all by grace. Nothing from me, at all. Thank you Lord for the cross, for Your amazing love!

He asked me to deny myself and love Him more. Denying self so that He can pour out more of Himself into me. So that when people see me, they don’t see me, they see Jesus. Denying self so that I know that it is not me, not my work nor the work of any man, but the work of His Holy Spirit alone, and that all the glory goes unto Him. So that I will not take pride in this very cool task He entrusted me. Haha.

Few weeks ago, in discipleship we were asked to write down what God has called us to be. Man, I was pretty clueless of my calling at that time, I just was not sure at all of what I should write. We were given few minutes to pray. So, I did, and just wrote the desire of my heart at that time. I want to be a woman after God’s own heart. And it is coming true!

“Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 37:4) I really believe this. No, I don’t just believe, I’ve experienced it. And I tell you one thing, when the Lord is your delight, you don’t want anything else but Him. For real. You don’t truly delight in the Lord when your heart still craves for material things.

Furthermore, God opened up a scripture to me this morning, about the vine and the branches. Jesus is the true Vine and we are the branches. Attach to Him, and we will bear fruits. Detach from Him, and we will wither and die. We need Him, not just everyday, but every hour, every minute, every breathing second. John 15:1-8

As I shared with Stan last night, daily communion, relationship with our Lord is vital. It is like breathing. It is like the vine supplying the branches with all the nutrition they need. No favour, anointing or blessing that will flow if we are not attached to the source. And it is continual. A flow is continual. We’re given to give and we need to keep being refilled to keep giving, to keep functioning. All God’s promises are conditional, provided we stay with Him, close to Him, very close to Him. There must be intimacy, between you and God alone.

Oh I am excited for the forthcoming movement of the Holy Spirit! There will be more great things to come and I am looking forwards to more experiences and more sharings!

Be blessed :)
God loves you!

xoxo
allie