wedding zen

I am less than two weeks away from my wedding day, and strangely I feel relatively at ease. Well I said relatively since I still get uneasy sleep once in a while (which is a huge deal for me who is usually a very very heavy sleeper). Once I was woken up in the middle of the night after a nightmare of being forty five minutes late to my own wedding, then could not go back to sleep again for another couple of hours, which were unwisely spent on bejeweled blitz.

I am also still waiting on a couple of last minute internet purchases which according to the tracking label are still stuck in Los Angeles. Panic time? Again, strangely, no.

Maybe this is what the world call wedding zen, kungfu panda call inner peace, and what I call surrendering. I somehow believe that everything will fall into place. And nothing is going to be perfect but that is life, isn't it? Life does not have to be perfect to be beautiful. 

I will have all my loved ones there, spend the day the way we like it, relaxed and slow. And God will be there. That is all that matters. Though, the lesson did not come easy.

Yesterday we had probably the best Sunday ever in a long long time. We did not do much, yet felt so satisfied. After morning service at church, boo and sis and I stayed for a bit for lodeh, empal and ikan asin at the cafe. Then we drove back to boo's place and watched Finding Nemo in bluray. I've always loved that movie and it is hard to believe that it was made 9 years ago! I still reckon it is the best animation ever. We finished the movie, and it was only 2.30. 

“Now what?”

I proposed a stroll at the reserve just a couple of blocks behind his place. Boo always mentioned how he (sometimes) jogs there and I’ve never been. Why not today while we have time? Weather was beautiful, and we all could do with a little bit of fresh air and sunshine in the midst of the hectic wedding prep. So, away we went and had the best arvo walk. Who knew that tucked away next to the eastern freeway, there is such a natural and peaceful space? Being the city girls we are, we oohs and aahs at the marshes and the duck that lives in it, little bridges, gravelly pathway and basically mini bushland just five minutes away from home.

We went to Box Hill central right after to satisfy sis' bubble tea craving, sat in the sun some more, wander semi-aimlessly in Centro, where boo and sis picked up their sonic key chains.

Another movie. The amazing punk kid Spidey.

Home cooked dinner.

Bliss.

The best day ever.

I won't apologize for the excessive use of superlatives. you can ask both boo and sis, it was awesome! It was so nice to have a laid back day, where you are not tied down by schedules and plans, where there is no rush at all to do things. It is good to be organized, but too strict and you will wear yourselves down. That is where most of us go wrong.

I believe yesterday was God's present for us. I imagine God sees us as punk kids who do not really know what they were doing. The real story is, boo and I fought the day before. We had a list of things to do we're desperately trying to cross off on Saturday. We were so bound onto the mindset of "I’ve got to get this done because there is no more time" and got really cranky when things did not go smoothly and thus went at each other. The day ended in sour note.

This is where it is amazing. We did not ask for the beautiful day yesterday. God intervened, because He loves us so. He knows we were about to break, so He gave us the special treat. What is that, if not love?

Take time to stop, sit back, relax, breathe slower and deeper, appreciate the moment and realize how blessed you are. Look at all the things around you. God works more in our life that we think He is and I am grateful He gave us yesterday. One cannot help but to believe that there will be better days to come He has written.

I think that is why I am not stressing over this wedding, albeit finding two large zits on my nose this morning (eep!).

Because I know that it is not in my hands,

…everything's going to be wonderful.